This holds everything as itself – always, all ways: shame, overwhelm, and nondual therapy

There are some experiences that feel so precious that it is believed they cannot be held. It is believed there isn’t the capacity of tenderness, sensitivity, and care within or without to meet such depth and intensity of purity and innocence in expression. 

Such purity and innocence might have been, within personal dimensions of experiencing, also believed to be unholdable by others, by those we have learned are the holders and the coholders. The ones with which we be in togetherness as safety and love.  

When this happens - when we experience activity born of this belief that our natural expression of inherent purity and innocence is unholdable, there is shock. Like lightening, energetic expressions of our natural being are petrified into a stronghold. Hidden by stories of what they are not – experiences of shame (and disgust), guilt (and blame) becomes how they are known.

This is genius.

Shame is how purity appears. Blame is the knowing that innocence is.

What better way to keep the most precious jewels of the felt psyche – the most potent doorways to realising our inherent innocence and purity of being (our true nature as the wholeness and source of all life) than to have them appear energetically

through petrification,

and conceptually

through damnation

relegated to ‘the most dense’, ‘the most contracted’, ‘the most limited’, ‘the most wounded’, ‘the most ‘not this’’ - and ‘not that’?

What an impeccable disguise for the most here, the most now, the most real.  

A feltness of stuckness, heaviness, confusion and doubt are the indicators that such precious jewels of innocence and purity are in plain sight - whilst feeling so immensely out of reach.

An increasing, tightening isolation in ‘here’ ensues – its effervescence appearing as an ever-dawning conviction that everything that is needed yet simultaneously feared is ‘out there’ across the gap. This feels like deprivation – and it’s a stalemate. ‘Out there’ can’t hold this. ‘In here’ can’t hold this. The attentional bridge falls.

Nothing to reach for. Nowhere to go.

Here, the overwhelm is now.

The tension of attention collapses.

Into this holding as purity itself.

This – all happening – by itself.

Life's natural grace.

The unconditional freedom of the absolute – expressing as the radically inclusive love of its own myriad appearances. It is this that the expressions of our most precious jewels and allies, petrified and disguised, truly need.

This holds everything as itself, always.

Thus, this is purity already.

The okayness of not okay

But in feeling the fullness of what is – we must enter through the feeling of what is not.

The numbness. The lack. The absence. The need.

This is why, when we come into a more direct contact of the seamless nature of our being (whether alone or in shared presence with ‘another’ who rests with us as this presence of being) there can be an emerging unsettledness or spontaneous rupture. What was petrified is given full permission to be. The immense vitality required to lock down the field of the felt can be released - in titration, or all at once. This can express through our humanness as a baseline depression, anxiety, and restlessness, or a spiritual and existential crisis. An intensity that no-body can hold and no-one can control.

And it is all perfectly okay.

All is already held in and as this perfect okayness.

This holds everything as itself, always.

Recognising the holding capacity of being.

It’s the most obvious when it’s the most obvious.  It’s the most not when it’s the most not.

And – its true. You and I as people cannot hold anything and never have. It has always been your being, our being – this one being – effortlessly holding everything – appearing as you simply being yourself, exactly as you are right now.

Everything is that.

All ways, always.

The overwhelm arises out of the belief that the one inside is the holder and limited as that.

This isn’t true.

This is not true.

The way of recognition is to notice as often as is remembered to do so – the holding capacity of this open presence.

Feel the fact of presence.

Notice all that is here.

What is all this in?

Your experience. YOUR experiencing. Right now?

What is all this in?

Where is it coming from? Where does it begin?

Are you doing it? Are you holding it?

Can you find an ending to this here?

Can you find an inside?

What makes outside outside?

Feel your whole experience all at once.

Let this percolate.

All is more than well.

Exactly as you are appearing – always, all ways.

This holds everything as itself, and this is what you are.

This is safety. This is love. This is one.